Recent Be-comings

I have recently started new work.

And I have learned about celebration. Celebrating life, but lately I have learned how celebration has become a form of masking for me. I, as anyone who knows me knows the happy go lucky kid in me. But I have recently realized how I mask my pain, my experience, my story-by the chance to throw a smile on others faces and to say there there-it's alright.

Cheer is a good thing, it is an asset that needs to be cherished and elaborated in this world. But also, I want to know how to bring cheer in the utmost authentic form. What does it mean to be a cheerleader for life? What does it mean to have Alopecia and celebrate. I keep celebrating for libration of hair, of beauty, and justice in this world. But it is important to articulate my story, my pain. I think it's important to share the hardship of what I felt, and what I am feeling.

Think of it like going to a party through a random friend, you're there and see banners with "happy birthday", but you don't know who the party is for- and you really wish you knew or was clued in.

I think in all of my celebration- I want to work on articulating my story, my journey (the trials and tribulations), because then people understand, people get a commonality between us all, of human emotion. And then we can put a name to a face at that party.

I simply then am not floating above others but dancing with the people.

Work- back to work. It is amazing to see the wake up calls I get in a day of how I live my life and where I want to go.

My work has the theme that we are all in Recovery. And I didn't quite grasp until I sat in on a circle of people I felt were so far away from me, and what my life experience was. There I was looking at myself in the mirror. And it was terrifyingly beautiful to open it up- to lay it out, and put the truth into action, and to celebrate about honesty.

To say I suffer sometimes, but it is through that suffering, speaking, and creating that I find justice in my mind and heart.

And I look around and I want to dance with life. But I have to remember that the a punchline is no good without the joke, and visa versa. Wholeness, recovery, and story is where I am at.